The Lonely Island

You know, there are some bands that are pretty amazing. There is The Offspring, Breaking Benjamin, Shinedown, and Three Days Grace. There are those crappy ones like Taylor Swift, Justin Bieber, and that one guy with the glass eye. Then there is the Lonely Island. They are in a whole division of their own. If I could describe them in a few words, they would be hilarious, amazing, ballsy, and very inappropriate. They may be inappropriate, but they are still amazing. The fact that they come up with the stuff that they do is unreal. No one would even think of putting the stuff they do into songs. This is mostly because of the fact that most people mature when they get older, but thankfully they did not.

I want to talk about their music. There are so many to choose from, but I know exactly which ones to talk about. I first want to talk about their song, I’m The Boss. This is a song that will go down in history as the world’s most random song ever created. It’s about going through a usual day of being “the boss”. It starts out by naming things that a usual boos would do during his/her day. Then things get real weird real fast. It starts out by saying he’ll shit on Debra’s desk. Then goes into saying things like sucking his dick, sucking another dude’s dick, chopping his balls off, meeting a giant fish and fucking its brains out, and bombing the Russians.  That’s not even their best song.

Everyone has heard their song, I Just Had Sex. It is a quality song. It really connects to people who, you know, just had sex. Featuring Akon made it just that much better. The chorus was amazing then the rapping parts were priceless. I learned that if you cry the whole time, if she kept looking at her watch, or if she was a racist, it doesn’t matter, because you had sex. Also, if she puts a bag on her head, it still counts.

They have a whole selection of songs just like those. They have one about jizzing in your pants, marrying a man on spring break and one about being on a boat. I can tell you that they are all quality songs. One was even performed by Happiness Inc. It’s called Jack Sparrow and is all about how Jack Sparrow is an amazing pirate. I would definitely recommend looking them up. You could learn valuable life lessons from them.